Here and Now

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Hey loves!

It feels like a lifetime since I’ve written to you and I’m so glad to be back. If you read the last post, you know that I spent the month of April on a social media hiatus in order to focus more on my spiritual relationship. Prior to beginning, I had clear plans of how the entire month would turn out and as usual, God squashed my plans and took total control. I had such high expectations and I thought that I would return with a zillion lessons to share with you all but in reality, I’ve learned about four.

April was sooo busy for me as finals approached and assignments piled high. This became disheartening because I was not able to dedicate as much time as I used to freshman year. During my freshman year, I was able to spend one to two hours in the morning reading the Bible and writing in my journal. By allowing myself to focus on that rather than focusing on the ways I planned to improve my spiritual life it began to pose as a mental block for me. Buttt there’s literally a lesson in everything and I feel like the Lord was using this to tell me STOP; stop putting so much pressure on myself to be someone that I was two whole years ago. Although that was a great stage in my life this can be an even better one if I allow myself focus on Christ and let Him meet me where I am, here and now.

Throughout the month, I was reminded that I thrive best when I follow a routine. With all the chaos of finals, I spent a lot of time fitting quiet time into my schedule rather than setting aside space in advance to dig into the word. This resulted in quick ten-minute devotions here and there and then calling it a day. This pattern defeated the entire purpose of the hiatus, so I put myself on a schedule. This positively changed the way I thought everything was going and my progress along this spiritual journey began to feel a bit more fruitful.

During the hiatusI spent a lot of time focusing on letting go and trusting God in my situation, and that felt amazing. Taking off my control freak hat and allowing God to have total control of my situations has always been a struggle for me and in this month alone I’ve made tremendous progress in this area. This is something that I’m sooo proud of lol.

Lastly, I was taken back to my number one enemy, self-discipline. I noticed the need for self- discipline when the month ended and I began to switch my focus towards blogging again. After a month of “relaxation” where all I did was scribble ideas down and move on, it was difficult for me to follow through and actually create new content. My thoughts in response to the topics I scribbled weren’t fresh and I didn’t want to force it. After a few weeks of procrastination, I realized that if I continued to let this be a reason for me to “chill,” I would never create content here again, and that’s just not an option. I literally had to talk to myself like a child and say, “sit down and don’t get up until you complete this task.” As silly as that sounds, sometimes the only way for me to get things done is to re-evaluate, notice my laziness and replace it with discipline. So here I am today, two months later, finally writing to you lol.

Although I did not learn as much as I expected to during this hiatus, I believe that I learned everything that I needed. I think that it is so important to periodically allocate time to focus on personal growth and the things that are most important to you. After all, you have to nourish yourself (physically, mentally and spiritually) first in order to help others. I feel so refreshed and I’m happy to be writing again. Can’t wait to hear from you!

P.S: At this moment, post-hiatus, I’m trying to find a happy medium between the time I spend on social media and the time I spend living life, outside of the screen. If you are unlike me and have mastered the “art” of the social media/ life balance, feel free to comment below with advice.

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2 thoughts on “Here and Now

  1. I can definitely relate when it comes to trying to be someone you were years ago! It can be difficult to let God meet us where we are, because you can get it in your head that a previous time or situation was better, or that a previous version of yourself was better (which really isn’t a beneficial mindset). I’m also the same when it comes to routine. It’s so hard to find the time and be consistent in college. I hope finals went well for you!

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    1. So glad that I am not the only one that experiences this comparison trap! I do believe that the more of an attempt we make to let God meet us where we are, the more of a relief we’ll feel.
      It is soooo difficult to remain consistent in college, it takes serious effort but I need a routine to help me feel balanced lol.
      + Finals went well for me thank God, hoping yours went well also. Thanks for stopping by! 💕

      Liked by 1 person

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